Pixie Post

Saturday, August 04, 2007

Let's start with A

A meme for August. An encyclopedia of me.
It's Bella Dia's idea, and I'm a little behind. Have a look at what she wrote on 31 July, and join in too.

Alone

July was not kind to me. Character building. There are lots of reasons, and individually they are managable, but one after the other? Well, just too much. With the pressure has come the realisation of some of the things that being alone means. There're the small things, like remembering to put the rubbish out for collecting, and dealing with the re-invasion of the mice, alone, because I'm the grown-up around here. The big decisions, and there are lots to be made, are mine alone.
Alone is, however, not lonely. There is freedom in being alone. My independent spirit is thriving. Let me know if I become cantakerous or intolerant. The few nights I spend at home alone, I treasure. I like the silence. I like to listen to the sea. Sometimes I like to play the same cd over and over with no-one to complain. I can read or blog all night and eat toast for dinner. I can fill the house with friends. I was more lonely in the last couple of years living in an easy, ordered family home than I have been this year. Loneliness was probably one of my main reasons for leaving. It was much harder to be desperately lonely in a relationship than it is to be alone.
So here I am, alone. It ain't so bad.

3 comments:

Linda said...

A for amen to that.

Helen said...

And you can race to the loo and not have to shut the door every time, walk from the shower to the bedroom in your birthday suit (if it's not too cold), read for as long as you like in bed, leave food in the cupboard and it STAYS THERE (unless YOU eat it), squeeze the toothpaste tube in just the right way, I could go on. For the mice I recommend those grey plastic "The Better Mouse Trap" type ones. They close completely over the dratted thing's head so you don't have to look at it's beady eyes while you carry it out to that rubbish bin that is just waiting to be put out come next rubbish day :-)

Antipodeesse said...

Oh boy, you struck a chord with me. I too am lonely, though not alone, and am still dithering about when to take that big, bold step.